A Letter to Musicians: A Reflective Offering for Every Flutist’s Journey
Learning the Hard Lesson
One of the most arduous battles I have faced is the relentless struggle with external validation. For years, I allowed the expectations of mentors, colleagues, acquaintances, strangers, and even social media followers to define my worth. I carried their expectations, realized, imagined, or otherwise, as if they were truth and gospel. And yes, one heavy critique could consume me! In the past, I even joked that I was a “neurotic martyr,” but the joke soon wore off. The ongoing trauma of becoming began to settle into my mental health and my body, showing itself as exhaustion and physical pain. My identity had become a mission to prove that I was “better than” whatever label had been placed on me. This constant need for external validation can be damaging, and it's crucial to be aware of its effects.
The shift from intrinsic to extrinsic motivation, as described by self-determination theory (Deci & Ryan, 2000), was a significant turning point. It meant that my happiness was no longer solely in the act of music-making itself, but in the outcomes — the audition, the chair, the job, the applause. This shift in perspective became a crucial part of my journey.
Reclaiming Self-Worth
Breaking that cycle requires a complete reorientation. I am not anyone’s critique or projection. My worth has always been mine to keep! That is the work I am still doing, embodying that universal truth so that I may experience lasting contentment and joy!
I often think of the “little Brice” who made music simply because it lived in his soul, before he was taught that, without continuous measurable achievements, he would be considered worthless in the eyes of the classical music world. Today, I perform, teach, write, advocate, and run celestialflute Academy, where I share a holistic body-and breath-based approach to artistry. Yet none of these roles or practices has made me immune to self-doubt or to impatience with myself as I grow, work, and learn. I am still learning and healing alongside my students and colleagues, sometimes feeling frustrated with how slowly progress seems to come. Like so many of you, I have sat in practice rooms feeling small after a cutting comment. If you have been told that you “sound like [insert derogatory term]” or that you do not belong, please know that you are not alone. The breath that carries your sound is enough. You are enough. Enough does not negate the strenuous work our career field requires. However, you are enough!
One of my favorite books, The Wisdom of Anxiety by Sheryl Paul, states that “our anxiety is not a sign of weakness or illness but a messenger, a signal calling us back to ourselves.” I believe this reflection fits wonderfully within the context of this letter. Anxiety and self-doubt can point us toward the very places that need our compassion and attention, and that is the work I am trying to do alongside you.
I also cannot ignore the influx of unkindness that I see within the flute community. Words speak volumes and can be the reason someone loses hope.
I write this letter on behalf of so many musicians who want and need to heal, and to remind us all that our speech and actions can either nourish or wound. May this be a call to choose compassion.
Research on musicians’ mental health confirms what many of us feel: our training rarely equips us to handle uncertainty and setbacks (Kenny, 2011). In our field, many teach how to win. Very few teach how to wait, or how to endure the perils of the waiting period when self-worth is most vulnerable. Almost no one teaches how to reroute. By rerouting, I do not mean giving up, but instead embracing a process of reflection that allows for a wider view of one’s life and artistry. I am learning that a macro perspective creates space to develop new skills and interests that may follow their own path or eventually lead back to one’s first love, mine being performance and pedagogy. A detour can be like taking the back roads on a road trip: slower, quieter, and often far more beautiful than the main highway. It can reveal sights and possibilities that would never have been encountered on the straight path. In this way, a “no” can become a “not yet,” A stepping stone to growth. We hold that power.
From Personal Reflection to Community Practice
This letter is not only about managing shame or disappointment. It is a bold declaration of self-love and self-worth! And it is for every musician reading this. None of us has life entirely figured out, but a little love shared can create a stronger sense of community. Remember, your worth is not defined by external validation. You are worthy, and your worth exists before any validation!
Through celestialflute Academy, I strive to create a model of inclusive, holistic, body and breath-based artistry that integrates technical mastery with mindfulness and representation. Recognition and achievement are not prerequisites for dignity or a sense of belonging. Artistic worth exists before validation! Resilience-based approaches to performance training echo this, emphasizing self-compassion, autonomy, and relatedness as protective factors (Seligman, 2011; Tarr et al., 2019). Together, we can create spaces where everyone’s worth is recognized, celebrated, and where self-compassion and community support are not just vital, but abundant!
An Invitation to Reflect
If you are a musician or teacher, I invite you to pause for a moment. Where have you allowed external critique to define your value? Have you ever harmed another person with your words intentionally or unintentionally? How can you reclaim your intrinsic worth? Your reflections are valuable, and I encourage you to share them in the comments below or connect with me on Instagram @celestialflute!
Closing
Friends, remember to keep the faith.
I am with you, I see you, I honor you, I love you!
Your worth is not defined by external validation. It exists within you, before any validation, and it is a constant, unchanging truth. You are valued, appreciated, and worthy of all the love and respect in the world. May your path be gentle, your breath steady, and your music rooted in joy rather than fear.
You. Are. WORTHY.
Much love,
Brice Smith, DMA — International Flutist, Educator, Social Media Strategist, Writer, Trevor James Low Flutes Artist, Equity Advocate, Founder of Celestialflute Academy, Breath-Based Artist
References & Further Reading
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227–268.
Kenny, D. T. (2011). The Psychology of Music Performance Anxiety. Oxford University Press.
Patston, T. J., & Osborne, M. S. (2016). The developmental features of music performance anxiety and perfectionism in school age musicians. Performance Enhancement & Health, 4(1–2), 42–49.
Paul, Sheryl. (2019). The Wisdom of Anxiety: How Worry and Intrusive Thoughts Are Gifts to Help You Heal.Sounds True.
Seligman, M. E. P. (2011). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Free Press.
Tarr, B., Launay, J., & Dunbar, R. I. M. (2019). Music and social bonding: “Self-other” merging and neurohormonal mechanisms. Frontiers in Psychology, 10, 251.
*Subject to revisions
